This
web site is about surviving Amnesia, Repressed Memories,
and controlling Post Traumatic Stress.

1975 – 2005
Understanding Repressed Memories
Exactly thirty
years ago this year, (2005) I discovered I had repressed memories. Today, I feel
very fortunate that I am still around to tell my story.
This web site
is about understanding repressed memory. I want
people to understand what repressed memories are and I want people
to know that despite the past publicity, the controversy, the
mystery surrounding amnesia or repressed memory, it a real phenomenon.
Lack of
knowledge,
misunderstanding and controversy hurt victims of repressed memory.
Too often victims are re-victimized by so-called experts.
They are mis-diagnosed, mismedicated and at times
permanently damaged by improper treatment.
For my children
For they could not
understand
It was early nineties
when I read the interview of a local psychologist in a Northern
California magazine. The interview was about the psychologist and
her first encounter with a client she felt had repressed
memories. (she called it as multiple personalities)
By her own
account the
psychologist, Dr. Trula LaCalle, did not know what to do. She
went in
search of another therapist to consult with her and finally,
after she made call after call, she turned up Dr. Paula Reynolds,
a Santa Barbara consulting psychologist. According to Dr.
LaCalle,
they went over the list of her patient's symptoms and Dr. Reynolds
assisted LaCalle in the first session of hypnosis. Then, Dr. LaCalle
was on her own and continued treating the patient, "despite her
uncertainty".
From this
experience,
continued LaCalle, she went on to treat other patients and a few years
later she was a top expert on the issue of repressed memory,
giving lectures and advising therapists from all over.
(Dr. LaCalle
wrote a
book, "Voices, " about her experience).
Reading this was
chilling. Tears filled my eyes and I did not know why. Only after
I could analyze the rush of emotions that filled my heart did I
comprehend the value of the magazine interview and how this article
related to me.
I had been working with repressed memories for more than fifteen years
when I read the article and for the first time, a professional admitted
what I
had been suspecting for a long time. They did not understand
repressed memory. Doctors, psychiatrists, psychologists,
therapists, they were treating people and they did not understand or
recognize a person with repressed memory.
I knew then that
I was alone.
Here are the
Consequences of
Incompetence 
I knew that if I wanted to survive this, I had to
develop a plan and depend on myself only. I worked hard,
so very hard. Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, three
hundred sixty five days a year. Non-stop, sometimes discouraging
hard work year after year. I seem to find the highest
mountains to climb, only to find more obstacles on the other side.
I persisted because I knew I would make it. Only, I did not know
long and how difficult it would be.
To begin to
understand the mechanism of Amnesia, Repressed Memory, Post
Traumatic Stress,
follow my steps to the following link:
Anatomy of
Amnesia
Understanding
Repressed Memories
An
incredible story
Continued . . . .



The following poem is Copyright ©
~ Francine
Pucillo ~
Used
on this site with permission
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On the shore of life
Contemplating thoughts
Brought to me in reveries
Reflecting what was taught
Life is filled with many waves
But always reached the shore
Navigation although hard
Was managed with great roar
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Resting now in happiness
My heart is so content
Feeling that no matter what
I know what courage meant
Assured that I can do this now
It gives me such repose
Trials and tribulations are
Just tiny little blows
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Sailed this ship within the storm
This navigation blessed
Proud to say that in the end
Each steering was conquest
Brave and strong I have become
Touched with confidence
Proud and true I'll always be
True woman of substance.
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Poem Copyright © by
~ Francine Pucillo ~
Used on this
site by permission from Francine Pucillo.